- Base your blog almost exclusively of links to other blogs. I love to spend time clicking around the earth.
- Configure your RSS feed to only show the first 16 words of your entry followed by an ellipsis (…). I hate having to read your blog in my RSS reader where all the other blogs are. This is slightly better than:
- Cropping your blog in half and replacing the second half with advertising.
- Don’t spell check your blog before you post, and then keep changing grammatical and style errors once it’s posted. My aggregator will then pull down each version, so I get to read the same stupid rant 8 times; 7 times with misspellings.
- Use relative links to any images so when I view them I get big white blank ugly boxes. This is especially helpful when you refer to the great photo you took of Yosemite. Was it during a blizzard or do you not realize my newsreader HAS NO KNOWLEDGE of where ../../img/lookatmeinyosemite.jpg is?
- Talk about music that no one has ever heard of. You know, the eclectic ones that ecletic people like. And then talk about how you dislike them when 3 people start liking them.
- Take five months off from blogging; then realize it has been five months; then write a post to just apologize. I am then left with several years and several apologies.
- Never post a picture of anything. I don’t like to see what things look like. I’d rather just picture it using the words that exude from your keyboard.
- Promise me how you are “going to post it tomorrow” and then never post it. I have always liked broken promises since Alison refused to square dance with me after she agreed to at sixth grade camp.
- Post “It works!” each time you want to test a new blog IDE, website style, or when you upgrade to a new blog version. Use “Hello World” also. I never get tired of reading that. In fact I think I am going to rename my blog to that (not a bad idea).
- Reconfigure your blog now and then so that I am forced to redownload the last 15 entries I have already read.
Man, I have violated almost all of these. 🙂 Lucky for me all of 3 people read this and they make fun of me regardless of whether I’m a hypocrite or not.
[Listening to: God Put A Smile Upon Your Face – Coldplay – (4:57)]